November 10, 2009

No Peace In The Valley


Hit another number on time's odometer this weekend. Possessed by a feeling of relief more than anything else these days. I still have a job (yes, we had yet another bloodbath at the veal pen last week), health, family, etc.

Challenging days ahead for sure.... apparently, the biggest growth market in psychiatry is in the spouses and children of working folk. The anxiety level has escalated to epidemic proportions with kids worrying that mom or dad will be out of a job.

Something is gonna give at work... too many suits walking around being shown the environs. Are we for sale? Who isn't? So we sit and hope the scythe is whetted at another site.


Good times. Good times.


How can I explain to those that weren't there
Of the days and the nights and the trouble we'd share
An old man's tale's at the end of the bar
I shoulda finished before I made it this far

Toonage:

November 5, 2009

What Happens In Vegas...

...stays in Vegas. Or something.

We survived our Halloween excursion to Sin City. It could be called "From Big Elvis to Coolio in three drunken days."


This is "Big Elvis"... down to 400 lbs from his original 800 lbs!

Three solid daze of booze, broads, rock n roll, horror and fun! We ended up doing virtually everything on our list. Some of the hilights were the Fangoria Magazine Trinity Of Terrors, the best bar in Vegas: THE DOUBLE DOWN; where we consumed much ass juice and did not puke, and the Halloween weirdness on the Las Vegas Strip.

We dressed as disco zombies... complete with silver foil disco shirts and much blood and gore. Our back story was that we were on our way to Studio 54 and were killed by zombies. And we deserved it. Why? Because we were going to a disco!

Disco Zombie meets the Oral/ Anal Girls

We also took in the club scene at the Hard Rock Flesh and Fantasy Ball. That was weird multiplied by a million. Old Nazz invented a dance move called the sway and topple. It's when you drink so much that you sorta fall into people. Punk rock!

Freaks!

Oh, did I mention that we spent the entire three days with a total of 5 hours of sleep? The only was to avoid a grievous hangover? STAY DRUNK!
The view from our room

We gambled a little bit and did the snake diet... one meal a day.

And our last bizarre encounter was at a 5 am $5.99 steak and eggs casino restaurant, where Coolio sat at the table next to us and was completely out of his mind .

Oh... in case you didn't know... there are hot girls everywhere in Vegas... they must grow em in a field somewhere!!!!!!!!!

I can't wait to go back!

Toonage:
Chuck Berry - Too Much Monkey Business
The Cramps - Dames, Booze, Chains and Boots
Three Aces And A Joker - Booze Party
Dropkick Murphys - Kiss Me I'm Shitfaced

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Now playing: Green Day - Welcome To Paradise
via FoxyTunes


October 27, 2009

Viva Las Vegas


Heading out to Las Vegas this Halloween weekend with my buddy (who is also the drummer from my band). A boy's weekend of debauchery as the Caterwaul Of Sound rhythm section invades Sin City for the very first time. Additionally, we will be heading to the Fangoria Trinity Of Terrors convention. Why? Because, aside from whoring our band and the movie we just did the theme song to; we're gonna meet John Waters, George Romero (plus they are screening his new movie- Survival Of The Dead, Roger Corman, Bruce Campbell and a coffin load of Vampire-Stripper wannabees!

As I have never ventured to Lost Wages (the land of the silicon enhanced single mom's) before, the last couple of weeks have involved planning last seen during the Allied storming of Normandy during D-Day.

Because the success of this venture revolves around the 4 P's:
Planning
Preparation
Passion
and, of course...
Perversion!

And, as we don't gamble, our money can be spent in far more interesting ways. Like Big Elvis... a 300 lb Elvis impersonator.

Planning on a Hunter Thompson-esque expedition.... only without the grapefruit. I hate grapefruit!

Of course, my lovely bride has completely approved of the voyage... circumventing any potential disasters by granting me full access for the weekend. She knows, that since I am such a douchebag contrarian, that by telling me that I can do anything; that I will do nothing!
Had she warned me that she would John Wayne Bobbit me if I came home with even a strip club matchbook; than I would have went hog wild.

By telling me that I can do anything I want, I won't do anything!

She is MUCH smarter than me.


Toonage:
Dead Kennedy's - Viva Las Vegas
ZZ Top - Viva Las Vegas
Elvis Presley - Viva Las Vegas



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Now playing: George Harrison - Beware Of Darkness
via FoxyTunes

October 23, 2009

No More Soupy


Soupy Sales died. That's a bummer. He was Punk Rock for kids back in the 50's and 60's and 70's. Hopefully, when the Grim Reaper showed up, Soupy hit him in the face with a pie. Rest In Peace Soupy, you were truly an original!




On another note, I have been sober and straight for 7 days. Part of which is due to overindulgence and a need to get clean for a big weekend coming up. The other part is due to this nasty cold that everyone in New York seems to have. If I start getting hungry for brains, someone please shoot me in the head.


Toonage:
Motorhead - Killed By Death
The Pixies - Wild Honey Pie (Beatles cover - Live BBC)

October 19, 2009

Booze & Blood, F#ck Yeah!


Well, we shot the music video for the Love Theme To Kids Go To The Woods, Kids Get Dead and what a bizarre experience it was.

We all thought it was going to be a quick little "one take" shot... but it ended taking about 7 hours!

We jumped in a van (note to you kids... when a guy drives over with a van and says: "hey, jump in and you can be in a video" be very careful!) and made about an hour ride to the site for the shoot. When we got there, it became apparent quickly that this was the real thing. Assistants were hanging tarp, setting up lights and all this other movie stuff.

As we were "THE TALENT" we were told to chill. So, we watched Blacula and drank Absinthe and 40 ounce Buds (and other kinds of buds too), until we were called to the set. I can see how a guy can get into alot of mischief just waiting around.

Basically, we played the song to a backing track as a full band two or three times and then we each did a solo version of the song for close-ups.

I learned right there that I am NO ACTOR. I was totally self conscious and unable to "project". But then again, I'm just the bass player, so I am spozed to be a bit stoic, right?

Than came the real fun, as the director bathed us all in torrents of blood (most of which was fake blood) and body parts, and we ran thru the song a few more times. The blood totally blinded me and I ended up trashing my contact lenses.

I crashed at my buddy's place as we didn't get done till close to dawn and I was in no condition to drive home.

Of course, walking to one's car in the light of day on a busy street whilst covered in blood is certainly an attention getter as well!
I highly recommend it.

I can't wait to see the finished product and will dutifully post it here!

Toonage:

October 16, 2009

Punk-tober

As some of you might know, I play bass in a couple of bands of the Punk genre. My lack of musical ability makes my choices perfect. Bass (4 strings, 2 less than guitar), and Punk (even I can play 5 notes) and of course, my ever sunny disposition.

My ever understanding wife has given me free reign to exorcise my demons in this manner, bless her little heart.

One of my bands, Dirty Pillows; has got a gig on Long Island in Amityville (yes, the home of this) tomorrow (Sat Oct 17), if anyone is in the environs. It's for a pet shelter - a good cause if there ever was one!

The neat thing about this band is that we play 2 or 3 times a year live, and practice about that much as well. Hey.. it's punk rock. Furthermore, as most of what we do is, ahem, "influenced" by The Ramones, as long as one of us can remember to count to 4, we're set.

Last nite we had our first and only practice for the show. We literally ran thru the set once and we were perfect (also sober... which MIGHT have helped). It's nice to be able to get together with some laid back people and not have any drama in a band. We have about a 20 year span between the oldest and youngest people in the band, and maybe that helps as well.
After running thru the set, we had a lot of time left, so we played some elongated 12 bar blues thang (which I named "The I Can't Bang Jennifer Aniston Blues") and some old Pete Seeger stuff.

And my other band, Caterwaul Of Sound, is shooting an actual music video tonight! Lots of blood and gore and bad taste will be involved.

Punk rock... it's what's for dinner.

Hey... check out this progression...

Toonage:
Green Day - Another State Of Mind (Social Distortion cover)
Social Distortion - Ring Of Fire (Johnny Cash cover)
Johnny Cash - Hey Good Lookin' (Hank Williams cover)
Hank Williams - Your Cheatin' Heart

October 13, 2009

I Wanna Rock N Roll All Weekend!


"Dad, can we go see KISS this weekend before they die?" asked Nazz jr.
"No sooner said than done, son"; I replied.

So after an ebay negotiation, we were off to see Knights In Satan's Service at the world's most famous arena.

Unlike other shows, of course, I would be the responsible parent. As a result, as the smells of ganja wafted and beers were drank around me, I remained the sober one (as of course did Nazz jr). Here's where things get weird... they had some sort of contest that you could enter if you were going to be the "designated driver" and I entered it.

And we won!

Right before the show begins a couple of arena personnel come to our seats and hand us a gen-u-ine KISS program.

Irony, thy name is Nazz.

It was a great show of course... exactly what you would expect from Gene, Paul and the other mooks. Explosions, Paul's raps between songs, lots of stuff from KISS Alive. Nazz jr was sporting dad's old KISS ARMY t-shirt and laughing at the handful of folks dressed in their "komplete Kiss kostumes".



The openers, Buck Cherry were pretty good too. They even covered Deep Purple's "Highway Star".

This was the night after seeing Bob Weir in a trio set-up which really showcased three things:

1) He can actually play guitar
2) He still can't remember lyrics with-out a teleprompter
3) Deadheads are getting older and more annoying as the years go on.

The biggest cheer went up when (on a small screen), The Yankees beat the Twins. Woo hoo! This show was at a converted bowling alley called (duh) Brooklyn Bowl. Great venue, lotsa microbrews, and no, I most decidedly did not win the designated driver award!

Toonage:
Here's a couple of Scandanavian covers of KISS!
Peck - Rock N Roll All Nite
Skellington - Love Gun

and, straight from the West Coast:
Redd Kross - Deuce

and the originals themselves:
Kiss - Deuce (demo version)