June 18, 2012

10 Things Preferable to the ROCK OF AGES movie



The very thought of seeing Tom Cruise, et al perform the wastebin of music (aka 80's hair metal) makes my skin crawl.  

Here are ten activities I would prefer

1) Prison Rape

2) Voting Republican (OK- I might have gone over the edge on that one)

  3) Loofahing Barbara Bush while her son GWB looks on.

4) Taking a sardine opener key and peeling my eyelids off.

5) Going up to Harlem with a white pillowcase on my head and asking "where are the hot chicks at".

6) You know that bug that Khan put in Chekov's ear in "Wrath Of Khan"- yeah- that!

7) Being locked in a room with Ann Coulter while she complains about her shoes being too tight.

8) Doing cannonballs in the the Ganges River during monsoon season.

9) Babysitting this:  

 10)Nude wrestle against the dreaded... HONEY BADGER!

Our long national nitemare will soon be over.

6 comments:

Jon said...

As soon as I heard about that movie I asked myself "What the fuck were they thinking?".

Michael P. said...

What people will do for a few lousy million bucks!

Heff said...

A Broadway Musical is ALWAYS just a Broadway Musical.....

Evil Rev said...

1) Nothing wrong with voting Republican !!

2) Listened to the soundtrack at work: it sounded like "American Idol Salutes The Hair Bands"

philo said...

Read that your daughter is getting a free ride
into college. From your top ten lists it appears your daughter intellect came from the mother's side.

Nazz Nomad said...

thanks philo- keep that positive reinforcement a-coming!