Ba$eball

The Polo Grounds

1883-1963

Another baseball season is upon us and once again we have high hopes for the Mets and the Yankees to pull their heads out of their respective areses and bring the World Series trophy back to New York.

Aw, who am I kidding? As a Noo Yawker, I just don't a crap anymore. Both teams have ass raped New York City and are about to receive gift wrapped new stadiums. What a joke. Hundreds of millions of dollars worth of corporate playgrounds when the money should be used for, oh I don't know; how about:

Public Schools
New York's crumbling infrastructure
Public Transportaion
Housing
Food for the poor

and just about anything else you can think of.

Both teams have perfectly usable venues currently. And both teams will erect new facilities with LESS SEATING (the better to milk more money per seat and generate new luxury box revenue).

Plus, they've both jacked up their prices this year as well (for the privilege of attending a game at the "old" Yankee and Shea stadiums.

And while the teams have spent the last decade denigrating their stadiums, neither team is above cashing in on crass fake nostalgia.

On the field, it can't get any more pathetic then last year's showings, can it? Between the Mets' historic choke and the Yankees getting biblical wrath poured on them; 2007 was truly bizarre.

Ah screw it;
here's some music from some people who couldn't give a damn about baseball.

Toonage:
From the Norwegian production of The Rocky Horror Show:
Ta Meg, Ta Meg (Touch Me, Touch Me)
En Hip Tranvestitt (Sweet Transvestite)
Tiden Blir Skrudd (The Time Warp)

and here's a Thai version of a Ray Charles Classic
Payom Moogda - Tamai Dern Sae (What I Say)

here's a Baseball one...
Earl Weaver going bat shit on a radio show in the 70's

Platinum

Happy 20th!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And they said it couldn't last!

I want you around
I want you around

They're telling us, they're gonna make a fuss
About the two of us

I want you around
I want you around

I know what you're thinking about ,
that you must have some doubts
I know what you're thinking,
when you find out I want you around

You know if it comes true, I'll be so good to you
I'll never treat you cruel as long as I've got you around

I want you around
I want you around

You heard that I'm no good,
yeah, yeah I'm no good
But I'll treat you like I should

I want you around
I want you around

You know if it comes true, I'll be so good to you
Ill never treat you cruel as long as I've got you around

I want you around
I want you around

They're telling us , they're gonna make a fuss
About the two of us

I want you around
I want you around
I want you around
I want you around

Toonage:
Ramones - I Want You Around
Led Zeppelin - Thank You (live)
Queen - You're My Best Friend
NOFX - We Got Two Jealous Agains
John Lennon - Grow Old With Me (Dakota sessions)

In The Pines, In The Pines

My girl, my girl, don't lie to me

Tell me where did you sleep last night

In the pines, in the pines

Where the sun don't ever shine

I would shiver the whole night through

My girl, my girl, where will you go

I'm going where the cold wind blows

In the pines, in the pines

Where the sun don't ever shine

I would shiver the whole night through

Her husband, was a hard working man

Just about a mile from here

His head was found in a driving wheel

But his body never was found

My girl, my girl, don't lie to me

Tell me where did you sleep last night

In the pines, in the pines

Where the sun don't ever shine

I would shiver the whole night through

My girl, my girl, where will you go

I'm going where the cold wind blows

In the pines, in the pines

Where the sun don't ever shine

I would shiver the whole night through

My girl, my girl, don't lie to me

Tell me where did you sleep last night

In the pines, in the pines

Where the sun don't ever shine

I would shiver the whole night through

My girl, my girl, where will you go

I'm going where the cold wind blows

In the pines, in the pines

Where the sun don't ever shine

I would shiver the whole night through

Toonage:

Leadbelly - Where Did You Sleep Last Night?

Grateful Dead - In The Pines

Nirvana - Where Did You Sleep Last Night?

Thinking hard and long about Punk Rock (ie- youth) nostalgia of late. Things seemed simpler than. Us versus them. As easy as it is to walk into a Hot Topic these days and buy your image, there was a certain thrill to creating it on your own. Although having to watch your back at all times was no fun either.

Here's a fun game. How many (and what) songs and bands are referenced in the following NOFX tune?

Johnny has a problem
Johnny is out of control
He had a TV party
With the kids in the black hole
Stealing people's mail
And lynching the landlord
Things to do when angry, young and bored

Johnny was only a lad
Johnny hates the scene
First he hit an old man
Then he hit and run Pauline

The record player spinning the best times I never had
So why do my old records make me sad?
Cause they're so bad
And no one seems to understand
The glory of guitar
When out of tune
The off timing
The singers who can't sing
The beauty of flaw

He's a teenage vegetable
This is the last resort
He's got PCP in his veins
He lives inside a quart
Johnny is a punk rocker
Johnny is he queer?
Johnny needed two bags
And a car to commandeer
Johnny wasn't liked much
But he had a lot of friends
Waits on stage
Eating ludes
A mindless brainwashed pig
Johnny was a good man
Till the day that he got shot
He had a jacked up chevy
That could blow you off the spot
Johnny always needs
More than he takes
Forgets a couple chords
Forgets a couple breaks
Johnny says he's bound
By only six strings to this world
Johnny Quest hates sellout bands
And Johnny Punk snorts ritilin
And Johnny is an angry amputee
NOFX - "Jaw, Knee, Music"

Was it really better "back in the day"? It seemed to me, that shit was alot more dogmatic. Those CBGS's Sunday matinees were a perfect example. Everybody looked the same. I had long hair back than and although I knew plenty of skins, I could never be in their little club because I wasn't cutting my hair.

It was nice back when the biggest issue was arguing who was more Punk.

My enemies are all too familiar.

They're the ones who used to call me friend.

I'm coloring outside your guidelines.

I was passing out when you were passing our your rules.

One. Two. Three. Four.

Who's punk what's the score?
Jawbreaker - "Boxcar"

Look at me, I'm in the front lines
I just came to have some fun
I've never seen this band before
I'm not like them, I'm hardcore
Government Issue - "Asshole"

Not gonna glorify the past, it was the same

We felt like the fire couldn't be contained

And it was you and me against the world

But we were already eating out of their hands

Dillinger Four - "How Many Punks Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb?"

Toonage:
NOFX - Jaw, Knee, Music
Jawbreaker - Boxcar

Dillinger Four -How Many Punks?

Government Issue - Asshole
The Hookers - Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You Tonight (Spinal Tap cover)

A St. Pattys Gift For You

(Leper, Leprauchan... what's the difference?)

I don't give a Leprauchans green ass about St. Patty's day. I'm holed up in Corporate Hell. And besides, if you need an excuse to go get drunk once a year, you're a giant pussy. Fucking amateurs.

Here's some ugliness to nurse you through your hangovers. Enjoy watching the ceiling spin...

Toonage:
Nirvana - Gallons Of Rubbing Alcohol Flow Through The Strip
Jon Spencer Blues Explosion - Hey Mom
Sonic Youth - Hallowed Be Thy Name
Crass - Sheep Farming In The Falklands
Husker Du - Drug Party

Feliĉan naskiĝtagon

Today is the meat in the sandwich day between the slices of bread of Mrs. Nomad and Br'er Nomad's birthdays. How's that for a bizarre alliteration. Especially since they would be such different types of bread. One would be an Artisanal Crusty Sourdough (in only good ways of course) while their counter-part most definitely is of the sensible Whole Wheat varietal. In other words, 2 quite dissimilar personalities. I have never been of the view that opposites attract, so that should be a clue as to which side of the shoppe I was baked in.

So, in tribute to the two people who have had to share either a bed (by choice) or a room (by birth) with me for most of my life, I dedicate the following tunes to them. And you might be surprised as to which songs are preferred by which of em.

Toonage:

Abba - Fernando

Foo Fighters - The Pretender

Foo Fighters - All My Life/My Hero/Times Like These/Best Of You/Everlong (Live Earth 6-07)

Bruce Springsteen - 41 Shots (live)

Kelly Clarkson - Breakaway (live VH1)

Altered Images - Happy Birthday

Ramones - Happy Birthday, Mr. Burns (from the Simpsons)

Exposed

In counterbalance to my last post; today I sat on a panel of industry leaders (I was the joker in the deck) at a conference and spoke of my business.

Here's some advice: It's probably not a good idea to use the term "corporate overlord" when speaking to a group of, well, corporate overlords.

All of my observations last week about being Mr. Executive Douchebag were blown out today I was exposed as a little twerp. I am pretty sure that the guy sitting next to me was wearing a suit that cost more than my car did. These guys were movers and shakers, and I was pretty much shaking the whole time.

It was an extremely long 90 minutes; and I noticed in the Q & A that no one was askin' me anything! Or coming up to me afterward. The moderater thanked me and told me I did a fine job. Yeah. Sure. At least I was more comfortable than this guy. Or this guy for that matter.

Musical offerings today are the last five songs that were on my MP3 player as I journeyed to the forum. My saving grace is that I am very confident that none of these songs are owned by my fellow panelists and I doubt they've ever even heard of the bands.

Fuck it. At least i got my punk rock.

Toonage:

Circle Jerks - Beverly Hills

The Cramps - Bikini Girls With Machine Guns

Dead Milkmen - Bitchin' Camaro

Dillinger Four - Bite The Curb, Bite The Curb

Ramones - Bonzo Goes To Bitburg

Perception vs Reality?

Closer than close

you see yourself

A mirrored image

of what you wanted to be.

As each day goes by

a little more

You can't remember

what it was you wanted anyway.

Private Hell... The Jam



The other day, it was past quittin' time at work, and as I was headin' out for a nite of hijinks, I had changed out of my corporate asshole attire and into my preferred mode of dress (ie: Punk Rock T Shirt and Jeans). One of the women who report to me (whom I have about 15 years or so on), did a double take. When queried, she told me that it was strange for her to see me in anything but corp-asshole threads. Since I am pretty loose at work (or so I thought) and I am always cranking r and r toonage out of my veal pen, this assessment disturbed me.

I've been with my present captors for over a decade, when I started here, I was a ponytailed, drunken, fuck-up. As I slimed my way up the corporate ladder, I always figgered I kept my mojo. Sure I have a position of power, responsibility and even greater aggravation. But aren't I the same idiot that stage dived at Minor Threat shows? Didn't I just get tossed out of a club a couple of weeks back?

As I look around at the influx of new worker bees, I realize that I am "THE MAN", the guy that people who see me around think is "Mr. Uptight Corporate Douchebag".

Most of the people I converse with at the job are the higher level people...and that's not even on work related topics for the most part. Even on the day to day sports bullshit, it's the big boys I tend to socialize with.

Is this a function of rank? Or is it because of common age? At a company event last year at a bar, I sat down next to some of the lumpen proles and they looked at me like I was their creepy old dad!

Meanwhile, there is little doubt to me that my post 9-5 life is as irresponsible and whacked out as their's.

I have a tie on as I type this (J. Garcia), a button down shirt (covering a Pete's Wicked Beer T) and Slacks (that are actually threadbare at the cuffs). My shoes have holes in them. Playin' on my iTunes is the Breeders' new album.

But, it's painfully apparent that on the outside, I am a ghost.

I was always an asshole, now I am a corporate asshole.

How the fuck did this happen?

Toonage:

Grateful Dead - Big Boss Man (live from Birth of The Dead)
The Kinks - Mr. Big Man
The Descendents - When I Get Old
The Jam - Private Hell (live 1980)
Cracker - Teen Angst

Feliz Aniversario Mo-Fo

Just noticed I hit my one year anniversary on this here blog a couple of days back. 365 days (and counting) of self indulgent bull-sheet with a heaping helping of music that I dig. Well, ¡Feliz Aniversario! to me!

Some housekeeping matters. Mi' compadre Mister Awesome has started up a wonderfully disagreeable site called "MUSIC VIDEO'S THAT SUCK". He'll be focusing on... well, ya'll graduated at the top of your classes, so I bet you can figger it out.

When this blog was liberated from it's conceptual womb (or something), the Ramones were it's first feature. So, it behooves me to start year number 2 off the same way. Ladies and germs, from Forest Hills, Noo Yawk... The Ramones!

Toonage:
Ramones - Live 11-14-77 Los Angeles
Ramones - Live on Mtv 9-28-94