Report From The Heartland

Just got back from Minnesota and I am tired, hungover and I sorta smell. But than again, I am usually tired, hungover and sort of smell. Everyone is soooo nice out there. Nothing like New York. But they do say "You Betcha" an awful lot! I didn't get a chance to get to The Triple Rock Social Club, the Dillinger Four's homebase. Bummer.

Driving 150 miles north of the Twin Cities, I was amazed by how many pro-life billboards are on the highways. I guess they take their Jesus pretty seriously in the hinterlands. Here's a car that I found myself parked next to.


The Metrodome (home of the Twins) is pretty cool. Indoor baseball is still an aesthetic monstrosity. The big sellers from the vendors were chocolate chip cookies and milk! Cheese curds and corn dogs seemed to be selling well outside too.
I, however, spent my hard earned cash on these. At 6 bucks for a 2o ouncer, it was the best deal around.

Here's a shot of one of the Nationals getting put on his ass from a hit by pitch. I bought a ticket outside for half price and moved around the stadium at will. This shot was when I was pretty much 2 rows off the field by home plate. There were 23,000 people at the game. The only non-whites I saw in the entire stadium were the players on the field.They call Minnesota the land of 10,000 lakes. 9,999 to go!

This is an elk farm. I did not ask if they were selling elk milk.

And here, is a celebration of our country's conspicuous consumption. The Mall Of America. My hotel turned out to be across the street, so I checked it out before I had to dash to the airport.
When you're in the heartland, I guess you get your corporate punk rock where ever you can. They were playing Radiohead inside. I asked if they had any Replacements or Husker Du or Dillinger Four . I don't think the clerk knew who I was talking about.They have a freakin' amusement park inside the mall. It actually looked like fun. More fun than buying shit, for sure.

Here's some toonage for the Dillinger Four. Because they kick ass.

Toonage:
Dillinger Four - Who Didn't Kill Bambi
Dillinger Four - Double Whiskey No Ice
Dillinger Four - Mosh For Jesus
Dillinger Four - Smells Like OK Soda