October 6, 2009

I Am Kelly's Liver

Awrighty now, as part of the official Nazz Nomad Rocktober celler-bration, the missus and I are gonna see MISS KELLY CLARKSON too-nite! Why? Because she fucking rules, that's why! Did ya evuh aktually HEAR HER SING?????? Like a combination of nightingales and angels. For real.

Yeah, long time readers of this here blog know that I ain't b.s.-ing when I laud the majesty of Ms. Clarkson. I don't care if she won American Midol or Best In Show or what-ever, she's got the pipes. And the songs too. I can admit that I have gone on stage at Punk Metal gigs and sung (sang?) Since You Been Gone. And loved it. Because I am fucking punk rock!

Oh yeah, Missus Nomad is going to be very very very happily attending this show with me and imbibing for three or four hours beforehand. Which will only pay benefits in the "good hubby" department for me. And what's the big deal about marital relations with a little puke on the breath anyway!

My buddy took his wife to see Pink last night and it wasn't because he wanted to hear 18,000 teenagers singing whatever the hell Pink sings. It's because one little nite of taking one for the team tends to equal about ten nights where the wifey looks the other way, dig?

I think I missed my calling. I should be a marriage therapist!


Jon said...

Bruce Springsteen and Kelly Clarkson. that is more big time entertainment than I've seen in my whole life. I used to HATE that kind of stuff. Then it dawned on me that, like most things that people do, I just don't get it. Nowadays, I listen politely and excuse myself quickly. Gotta go listen to the Holy Modal Rounders and get my head straight.

You definitely do know something about marriage. I was never any good at that "taking one for the team" shit. Even when I did it, I would get busted for faking it, or being visibly uncomfortable even as I said shit like, "No, baby I like if just fine". The best I could do was suffering quietly when forced to endure Chuck E. Cheese's house of horrors. I guess that was OK because it was for the kid, who was deliriously happy there. I did notice that Chuck E's made a big deal out of the fact that they sell beer and wine. I noticed a fair number of Mom'n'Dads who were pretty wasted.

By the way, count yourself lucky that it's only Kelly Clarkson. My first ex was a former professional dancer. Sounds glamorous? I had to accompany her to performances by New York experimental dance companies, not to mention ditching work so I could attend quarterly recitals for all of the classes she continued to take. I had to be very careful about being over appreciative of some of the younger, prettier dancers. We need to overcome our prejudice that dance is an art form for pretty young anorexics.

Andrew Weiss said...

It's guys like Nazz who make guys like me look bad for flaking out of attending a derby match the wife's playing in.

Anonymous said...

Kelly can sing, that's for sure. I would def like to spank her also. In fact, I kind of like her a little chunky. No skinny cookie cutter chick there. Enjoy Dr. Nazz!

Wil Harrison.com

AC@46 said...

Hey if you want some half way decent Kelly Clarkson live head over to ttp://musicartstyle.blogspot.com