The Police - Stink & Company

I am going to see The Police at Madison Square Garden tonight.
The last time I saw Stink & company was in 1982 or 1983, a show memorable for two things. The first was that the P.A. was playing Dead Kennedys music before La Policia took the stage. The second is the copious amounts of intoxicants that we consumed whilst sitting next to a mom and her 12 year old kid. Welcome to rock n roll sonny boy.

I have mixed feelings about tonight's show. On one hand, hey what the hell, it oughtta be at least decent (and potentially very fun). The Police have got plenty of great songs (almost all of the Outlandos d'Amour lp and most of the Reggatta de Blanc lp) On the other, if it's gonna be a great big audience blow-job to Stink, I might puke. I'm all for global responsibility, human rights and tantric sex; however, there is something about old Gordo' that just pisses me off.

From an interview I read in some old hippie rag, it seems that Copeland and Summers aren't exactly in love with his Stinkness either.

Initial reports of the live show placed everything as being performed at about 3/4 speed. And if Stink starts doing the jazz bullshit, I'm gonna go down to the stage and take his bass away and play it myself.

I have heard lately that they have picked up the pace, and are actually expanding the tunes a bit and jamming. We'll see.

My big decision will be to whether to take a piss break for "Doo Doo Doo Dah Dah Dah" or for "Every Breath You Take".

Report to come once I'm sober.

Here's a collection of live, demo and radio stuff from 1978 and 1979.

Toonage:

The Police - The Lost BBC Tapes

High Times with the MC5

aka Dope, guns & fucking in the streets

Since we kicked out the jams last week, it's high time to pay tribute to the MC5. Whether they are viewed as White Power revolutionaries, proto-punkers, or heavy metal hippes; one thing remains certain: THEY FUCKING ROCK.

As evidence and testement to their powers, I am offering up some live stuff from 1970, some more live stuff from their sorta reunion in 2004 (with some special guests) and an assortment of rarities.

Have at em...


and here's a kick ass site with alot of MC5 links.

Buy MC5 music here

Toonage:

MC5 - Live 1-1-70
MC5 reunion - Live 2004
MC5 - Demo's, Outtakes and live oddities

We're a Garage Band

"We're a garage band

We come from Garageland"
--The Clash

Sometimes it's just nice to kick out the jams, muthufuckas.


So that's what me and some pals are doing tonight. As we have all been in Rock n Roll stasis as of late, we figured it was high time (and it will be a high time) to hook up and blast the shit out of some rock.
After all, what's wrong with making alot of noise, aided by various intoxicants and a three chord ideaology.

Undoubtedly, it will be sloppy caterwaul of sound.

Perfect!

PS - If John Doe is touring in your area... go see him! Saw the show in NYC last nite and it was fantastic. A smattering of old X tunes, but the solo stuff was great. And GO HERE to stream his new album A Year In The Wilderness.

And if you want to play the home version of our jam... here's the songs we will probably start out with. Just punch a hole through your speaker, fire one up and it'll be like you're there!

Toonage:
Ramones - Surfin Bird (live Northwestern U 1979)
AC DC - Highway To Hell
Sonic Youth - Death Valley '69
Mudhoney - In and Out of Grace
Stooges - 1970 (live 1971 - Cinn Pop Fest)
Hole - Celebrity Skin
Pixies - Gouge Away

Coked, drunk & stupid is no way to go though life

Anyone remember there's an illegal war going on? Anyone remember an administration full of criminals? I guess not. The media finds the tale of addict actresses more compelling.

The tale of Lindsay Lohan gets more pathetic.
I will say this... if I was a 20 year old movie star; with unlimited funds and carte blanche, I'd probably be dead. And most of you would be too. How many times have YOU put yourself in a self destructive situation?

Hell, when I was in my college years I almost cashed in a bunch of times and I was broke most of the time. Luckily, after a few calls too close for comfort (and some a little too recent), I have realized that there is no glory in croaking at an early age. Or, for that matter, going to prison.

I would like to think, however, if I had the money that Hollywood's dumbest has; that I would have hired a freakin' driver to take me around!

Toonage:
Rolling Stones - Stupid Girl
Screeching Weasel - Stupid Girl
Funcadelic - Super Stupid
AC/DC - Have A Drink On Me
Husker Du - Whatcha Drinkin?
Johnny Cash - Cocaine Blues

I Wanna Be Stereotyped

So, this past weekend, a friend of mine asked me if I was heading to the Siren Fest out in Brooklyn (Coney Island, to be exact). My answer was no... because I wasn't going to hassle with two hours of traffic and parking nightmares just to see a bunch of bands that for the most part I have already seen or had little interest in. Even worse, the prospect of being in a hot, sweaty, crowded maelstrom surrounded by annoying hipsters made my skin crawl.

My friend then responded that I was a suburban #$%&* (or words to that effect).

Well, I spent the weekend in my pool; listening to music I wanted to hear and drinking good beer. When that got too overwhelming; I sat in my backyard, lounging about, listening to music I wanted to hear and drinking good beer.

And instead of eating tepid, fried crap; I grilled good crap. And drank good beer.

So, maybe I am gettin' old. Maybe I am gettin' lazy. So what?

Toonage:
White And Lazy - The Replacements
Sunny Afternoon - The Kinks
Suburban Home - The Descendents
Rockin' The Suburbs - Ben Folds & William Shatner
Hey Suburbia - Screeching Weasel
Suburbia - Adrenalin O.D.

Friday fun! The Misfits!

I guess by now everyone has heard of The Misfits. Although for many for us, The Misfits effectively ceased to be valid when Glen Danzig (Danzig was in The Misfits??? Who knew?!!!!!) left the band in 1983 (after Earth AD), the band (and more significantly, the merchandi$ing!) continues on. The ubiquitous Skull logo is on everything from T-Shirts to lunchboxes. Has Avril Lavigne started wearin' a Misfits shirt yet? Cause she's so Punk Rock!


Commercial posturing aside, The Misfits were a great band... from the early singles like "Bullet" and "Horror Business" and "Teenagers From Mars" to THE CLASSIC Walk Among Us; they practically invented the horror punk niche. Those early singles are now big bucks collector's items... I made a tidy profit on my "Horror Business" first pressing a couple of years back! At this point, much like the Ramones and The Stooges, it's almost a prerequisite for a punk to cover a Misfits song.

And the lyrics are so wonderful: "I've got something to say/ I killed your baby today" and "Kennedy's bullett ridden body in the street/ Ride Johnny Ride" and "I ain't no goddamn son of a bitch/You better think about it baby" and of course:

With just a touch of my burning hand

I send my astro zombies to rape the land

Prime directive, exterminate

The whole human race

Sheer freakin' poetry!!!!!!!

I've got some good stuff for ya'll today... some Misfit's cover songs and a show from December 1978 at NYC's Max's Kansas City. So, get some grease and make that devil-lock, it's time for some Misfits.


Toonage:
Hellacopters - Bullet
Metallica - One Last Caress/Green Hell
My Chemical Romance - Astro Zombies
Guns n Roses - Attitude

Refused - Bullet

Drag The River - Hybrid Moments

Henry Rollins & The Misfits - We Are 138

Misfits - Live @ Max's JKansas City - 12/78 (whole show)

Gettin the Led Out

Hey, if you happen to be in NYC Tuesday nite, you should check this out.

You get to indulge your rock star fantasies and get up on stage and sing with a real kick ass punk / metal band. You can sing anything from Black Flag to Led Zeppelin to The Ramones to Black Sabbath. And don't worry if you suck. The band is so good that no one will ever notice!

Punk Rock Heavy Metal Live Band Karaoke

And now onto music... as we dumped the progeny off at grand-ma's this weekend, we were able to "get the led out".

So here's some duets' that you might enjoy. Oh yeah, and a Led Zeppelin show too!

Toonage:

Led Zeppelin (live Milwaukee 7-25-69)

Paul Westerberg & Joan Jett - Let's Do It

Motorhead & Wendy O Williams - Stand By Your Man

The Subways - Oh Yeah

Tom Jones & Chryssie Hynde - lust For Life

Hottest French Chick, Ever!

Whaddya expect? Bridgette Bardot?
Hey it's the lady! It's Bastille Day tomorrow, which proves the French had the right idea when it comes to assholes in charge. So here are some songs to commemorate the day when the head's went a-rolling!

Toonage:

Rush - Bastille Day (live 5-30-76)
The Meatmen - French People Suck
Black Flag - Louie Louie
Iggy Pop - Louie Louie
Flamin' Groovies - Little Queenie
The Chentelles - Be My Queen
Sex Pistols - God Save The Queen (last show ever 1-14-78)

This Town's Too Hot

It's just too damn hot. And in New Yawk City, hot weather means the entire island turns into a fetid, rancid cesspool. The twin assaults of rotting garbage and urine combine into a smell that brings one to their knees. Add in the horrors of having to actually be pressed against fellow commuters on the subway, many of whom seem unaquainted with the most basic rules of hygiene.

It's the 21st century. Take a freakin' shower you animals!

And what's with women wearing flip flops everywhere? Open feet wallowing through the grime and dirt of Manhattan? Yeccchhhh!

Here's some toonage that should rock you out of your own personal sweltering nightmares...

Toonage:


The Neanderthals - Too Many Nights In A Gin Mill
The Countdowns - Pussy Stank
The Boss Tweeds - Faster, Pussy Cat! Kill! Kill!
The Replacements - White And Lazy
Squirrel Bait - Kid Dynamite
The Specials - Too Hot (live NYC 1980)

Ratdog

Hey maannnn, let's go catch the Grateful Dead at the free concert in Central Park.

Well, it ain't the Dead no mo, it's Bob Weir & Ratdog. It ain't a free concert, it's about $45. And while it's still Central Park, it's an enclosed amphitheatre.

Any you know what, that's just FINE BY ME!

I'll take what I can get. Pigpen's dead over 35 years. Jerry's been dead almost 12 years, thanks to these. Four dead keyboard players. The rest of the Dead have scattered to the 4 winds. At least we still have Bobby, relentlessly playing and touring. And what's with that beard? Wasn't he the "cute one"????

But play they do... and while Phil Lesh tends to explore the outer dimensions of the music with Phil & Friends and Mickey Hart's got the "world music" thang, Bobby keeps things in the more song oriented spectrum (at least for the most part).

Shit, he even plays plenty of Jerry tunes. And the non Dead stuff sounds pretty darn good too.

And while your mileage may vary, the last few years of the Dead (let's say the post coma Jerry 1990's) were often not stellar shows. A large percentage of head's were there for the party and not the music.

There are strong rumors that the Grateful Dead bus woulda been parked even if Jerry didn't die; especially after the Spring 95 "Tour From Hell".

This Ratdog tour brings Steve Kimock back (taking the place of Mark Karan, who is battling throat cancer).

So, I can't wait! I'll be wearin' my combat boots and my tie dyed Black Flag shirt (maybe) ; so if you're at the show, don't call me "bro"! I hate that shit!

Toonage:

Ratdog live 9:30 club Washington DC 3-31-04

(disc 1):

Dark Star Jam

Jack Straw

All Along The Watchtower

Dark Star (1st verse)

Odessa

Ramble On Rose

She Says

Two Djinn

Save The Planet

Kill Yourself

Friday Grab Bag - Prison Bound!

Here's to the most American of experiences. Prison!
As of June 30, 2006--
-- 2,245,189 prisoners were held in Federal or State prisons or in local jails.

-- Over 50% of those held in federal prisons are incarcerated due to non violent (ie: drug) offenses. Yep, the War on Drugs is really working out!

- - there were an estimated 497 prison inmates per 100,000 U.S. residents; up from 411 at year end 1995.

I would suspect that many of my fellow travelers have spent a night in the pokey. Hey, it's good for character building, right?

Toonage:
Jerry Garcia 5-5-82 Oregon State Prison (whole show!)
Johnny Cash - Live inside a Swedish Prison (whole show!)
Social Distortion - Prrison Bound
Social Distortion - Orange County Jail (demo)
Dan Bern - Jail
Wanda Jackson - Riot In Cell Block 9
Leadbelly - Birmingham Jail

America part 2

The unanimous Declaration

of the thirteen united States of America

When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

— That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed,

— That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.

— Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do.

— And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

Toonage:

Elvis Costello - Crawling To The USA

Team America - America, Fuck Yeah!

Merle Haggard - America First

Elvis Presley - An American Trilogy (live)

Circle Jerks - American Heavy Metal Weekend

Pennywise - God Save The USA

America part 1

THE BILL OF RIGHTS
Amendments 1-10 of the Constitution

Amendment I

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.

Amendment II

A well regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed.

Amendment III

No soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, without the consent of the owner, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law.

Amendment IV

The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

Amendment V

No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a grand jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the militia, when in actual service in time of war or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offense to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.

Amendment VI

In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the state and district wherein the crime shall have been committed, which district shall have been previously ascertained by law, and to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witnesses against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the assistance of counsel for his defense.

Amendment VII

In suits at common law, where the value in controversy shall exceed twenty dollars, the right of trial by jury shall be preserved, and no fact tried by a jury, shall be otherwise reexamined in any court of the United States, than according to the rules of the common law.

Amendment VIII

Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted.

Amendment IX

The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people.

Amendment X

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the states, are reserved to the states respectively, or to the people.

Toonage:

MC5 - The American Ruse

Black Flag - American Waste

Bad Religion - American Jesus (live John Peel show)

The Clash - I'm So Bored With The USA (Rude Boy)

Pearl Jam - Know Your Rights (Clash Cover)

Monster Magnet - Freakshop USA